I’ve heard that it takes ten compliments to offset one criticism. Sounds about right, doesn’t it? We can receive all sorts of compliments, but the thing we remember is the one negative comment. That’s the tape that plays in our heads in an endless loop.
It gets worse if the voices from our childhood offered more negatives than positives, if we heard more criticism than praise over the years.
Please don’t misunderstand. I’m not bad-mouthing parents or want anyone to feel guilty. What I’m saying is that we subconsciously take the things we hear, especially the negative ones, and make them part of the soundtrack of our lives.
Those beliefs about ourselves hum in the background in an endless loop, until an opportunity presents itself. Then they ramp up to full volume and blast out opinions on our ability. If falling short and not quite measuring up were part of what we absorbed, the deafening chorus may sound something like this: “Who are you to think you can do thus-and-such? You? Seriously?”
Have you been there? Most of the women I know have, myself included.
What Are You Telling Yourself?
I think it’s time to change the tape. Instead of cleaning out drawers this spring, let’s clean out the junk in our heads. Consciously take out those old tapes and replace them with new ones.
The truth is that YOU are valuable. You have gifts and talents no one else in this world has been given. Use them, despite the fear, despite the worry that your gifts are not good enough, that you’re not good enough.
Your worth is not measured by the old tapes in your head.
You are gifted and talented and worthwhile.
And loved, so greatly loved by the Great Creator who made you just the way you are.
Those are the tapes to listen to as the background for your life.
Those are the truths to listen to when opportunities come your way.
Those are the truths to stand on as you follow your dreams.
What are you telling yourself? It may be past time to change the tape.